Updated: Mar 4, 2019
"Fitness Journey", WTH does that mean, and why would we care? I’m sure this is one of the first things that come to mind, or possibly an eye-roll for all those who have struggled to even get started!
So in December of last year, 2018, I woke up with the most horrendous Acid Reflux ever and proceeded to have 2 hours of puking up nothing but stomach bile, which within itself was quite strange given the fact that I’ve taken my antacids routinely every day for the past 8 years, since I had my first daughter. This continued for weeks, ER visits, specialists, you name it, no answer and no light at the end of the tunnel. 2.5 weeks later I was down 12 lbs. and had barely left my bed. Unable to care for my 4 children or simply live, I decided that if the doctors couldn't give me an answer that I’d do something about myself. I slowly started to incorporate solid food back into my diet, but I was more intentional about what I was putting into my body.
I'm sure I'm not the only mom with multiple children who is guilty of pouring my all into my family and putting her own health on the back burner. I often only ate 1x day, and what I was eating was often unhealthy quick and increasingly satisfying!!! Binging out of starvation at 9pm most nights.
Sitting in the doctor’s room time after time hearing "we don’t know what’s going on" and being prescribed pill after pill I had had it! I had a thought, I need a lifestyle change if they can fix me then I’m going to have to fix myself. So that’s exactly what I’ve been doing.
No greasy food, nothing with high amounts of sugar, no food with acid, lots of water, high quality vitamins, and I’ve been working out 3xs a week. I started slowly, but I’ve been working in one high intensity work out a week and I’ll be moving it up to two. I plan to take this opportunity to build onto these 12 pounds and really make a severe life change. I still have some testing to get done but, in the meantime, creating a healthier lifestyle is my main goal.
It’s funny because for the first 3 weeks of going to the gym I was so terrified of stepping foot into any of these classes, I wanted to wait until I was skinnier so I can fit in with all those "fit moms.” The fear of judgment was overwhelming! Does anyone else ever feel like that? One day I just decided to go for it. I was met with the warmest welcome from the spunky Barre teacher, her name was Heather. I remember my heart racing as she asked the class to stand and prepare to begin. Please don’t look at me, please, don’t stare at my fat arms I thought. As I continued the self-deprecating thoughts, I tuned into her voice and heard her say “come on guys don’t worry about what anyone else is doing, don’t compare your fitness journey with anyone else's, we are all on different levels and that’s ok just do the best that you can that’s all that matters!” I wonder to this day if she read the fear in my face and if that message was specifically for me. Whether it was or it wasn’t, it was exactly what I NEEDED to hear. I’ve been going back at least 1x a week sometimes 2 and every time I leave that class, I feel so accomplished it honestly boosts my whole day!
Anyhow, I guess what I’m trying to say that if any of you mamas are feeling at all like how i felt, how i still feel even you’re not alone. Having babies and having them completely high jack your whole body and sense of who we are is rough. But I’ve recently come to realize that that does not have to stay the case.